Hard lessons in Hatherleigh

I headed off to my next host with high hopes of learning more new skills: he worked with wood, doing carvings and making charcoal and also worked the land with heavy horses. I was very excited at the prospect of spending a month learning new things and above all, working with the horses.

It didn't take long to drive from Launceston to Hatherleigh and I arrived just before lunch and was taken to my new quarters - a mobile home. I knew it was a mobile home before I applied to come and I had also made sure that it had heating. Unfortunately, it soon became apparent that there were lots of other questions I should have asked, such as:

Does it have a functioning loo? No - the loo is located across a muddy yard in which two large pigs free range, over a three-pole barrier, across another muddy yard, round the back of the house and through the back door. This is also where the washing facilities are housed - there is no hot water in the mobile home:

Am I the sole WWOOFer? No - there are three other people here already, one a young lad will be sharing the mobile home with you and the couple have a timber hut but that is only for sleeping in, for the rest of the time they are also in the mobile home:

Are all meals provided? No - breakfast and lunch are self-catered using food provided (sliced cheap bread, tinned sausages-with-baked-beans, chicken meatballs in tomato sauce, etc.etc - you get the picture) and most evening meals are eaten in the farmhouse with the family.

Will I be involved in the woodwork business? No - there are two full-time employees as well as Ben, so there are no opportunities for WWOOFers to get really involved.

Will I be able to learn to work the heavy horses? No - the horses are not being used at the moment as it is the wrong time of year so they are out in a paddock during the day and in at night.

I was rather disillusioned, as you can imagine, when the young Hobbit inhabiting one end of the mobile home filled me in on all of the above. At least the three WWOOFers were friendly but I think they were a bit taken aback by the arrival of this middle-aged woman who asked lots of questions and didn't particularly want to watch back-to-back Rugby matches on the TV! We were all a little dismayed when one of the chaps revealed that it was liver for supper and he knew for a fact that it had been in the fridge for ten days! They asked how long I would keep fresh liver in the fridge and I said about a week at the most and then I'd need to see it and smell it to check it was still OK. We headed over to the house when the horn was sounded to summon us and I tried to take the smaller bits of liver, working on the theory that they would be the most thoroughly cooked - I wished I'd said I was vegetarian now.

After supper, we washed up and headed back to the caravan and I was furnished with a bucket by the youngsters in case I needed to 'go' during the night, which I thought was very kind of them. The Hobbit also lent me his hot water bottle. However, any number of hot water bottles would have been needed to air that bed - all of the bedclothes were really damp and clammy. I slept in my pyjamas and dressing gown and was still cold and uncomfortable.

At 5.30am I woke up and thought long and hard about what I was going to do - I could be intrepid once more and put up with the conditions for a whole month, or I could leave. By the time dawn arrived I had decided to admit defeat and acknowledge what I am - a middle-aged, middle-class woman who likes some creature comforts including a dry bed.

When my host came over in the morning and offered me the chance to ride one of the Shire horses it took me all of 30 seconds to decline the offer and tell him I was leaving. For anyone who has known me for a while, you will realise how much I would have loved to ride one of those gentle giants, but not enough to stay another moment longer than I had to.

I repacked my car and drove out of the yard without even changing out of my wellies, so desperate was I to leave. I stopped about a mile away where I had some reception and phoned Jo and James whose parting words to me had been 'If you ever find somewhere that you don't want to stay, come back, we'll always fit you in somehow'. I just hoped that they had meant what they said. Their phone was on answerphone so I left a message and headed back to Launceston. Nathaniel showed no surprise at my reappearance as Jo had already rung him to let him know I was on my way back and to tell me that it was fine. We had a bit of lunch (I hadn't stopped for breakfast) and then I had a soak in a hot bath and clambered back into my warm, dry bed where I stayed for the next three hours. It was only then that I realised that in my one day away I had probably caught a cold and been given food poisoning! I had lasted precisely 22 hours in Hatherleigh (I'm sure there's a song in there somewhere!). Now I had to regroup and decide where I went from here..........